the only constant now is thinking about you
And sometimes we play this game in improv class. When someone says „kitty needs a corner“ the other person answers „my neighbor“ and all of a sudden everyone starts to run, run so fast and look for a new place in the circle. Then it starts all over again. It’s a silly game. It's supposed to make you energetic. But all it does, all it leaves me with is thinking about you. Thinking if you ever look down from your balcony and see me walking down the street. Wondering if you think of me every time you leave or enter your door. Wondering if you ever think of me at all. I always take a few extra seconds to look for my keys in my bag, in case you were just around the corner. I want to make sure not to miss you.. and it’s been like this for months now and I haven’t seen you ever since. I wonder how long I’ll take extra seconds or walk extra slow or extra fast, in order not to miss you. I wonder how long it’s gonna be you who’s on my mind and when, finally, it will be someone else, someone different, someone new. Hopefully someone who’s gonna paint my walls more brightly, more vibrant, more happy, because you left my soul with marks and it hurts and it always will, but I am so willing to leave all of that behind me. My brain just needs to tell my heart.